Listening for clues should be part of everything we do in life, Flying Included. I get that it is difficult to listen at times. When I am in the cabin with a Mistress of Monotone who reads at a grade 7 level. I too am fighting JUST as hard as you to not slip into a boredom induced coma. Come on, we know this Guy or Girl has been with the airline for about 3-30 years. Hiding around the corner of the galley with a piece of paper reading from a script doesn't make me feel like listening either. Honestly not all Flight Attendants should be funny, but can't you be at least interesting? Heaven forbid...Engaging? All it takes is the slightest adjustment to your vocal cords. Imagine it isn't a script but a conversation. Your not going to bend people to your will sounding like the teacher from Charlie Brown.
We are born with an ability to communicate. The phone was something we all spent a great deal of time on as teenagers. Before texting we used smoke signals, before Twitter we had a club with a nail in it. So I feel WE should all be able to pick up the Inter phone and "Press to Talk"; then share the actual things travelers need to know before during and after the flight.
SUGGESTIONS
Prior To The Main Cabin Door Closing.
***"You are now on a plane that is going to (insert destination here)".***
If you think you are going somewhere else, even for a second, please don't be embarrassed. Stand up and ask the question. "Where am I about to go?" It isn't your fault, no one really looks at your boarding pass when you get on that flight. Not enough Coffee has been yet consumed, or its simply the fact that it is electronically embedded onto the worlds smallest Smart Phone screen. This statement about where the plane is going needs to be said in as plain a fashion as possible.
Forget mentioning the flight number.
Forget mentioning the name of the airline that you work for.
Just tell the people inside the plane that they are going to the name of the next city you happen to stopping at.
I have been on that flight when a traveller says (at the end of the flight). "Abbottsford? I thought we were going to Vancouver." They also thought that Vancouver was the name of the province that Abbottsford was a part of. But you don't have to win an episode of Jeopardy to fly with; or work for an Airline.
***"Turn It Off"***
I don't care if it is in Airplane Mode. Your on a Jet.
You are going to live without music for the next 10 minuets. Please just shut it off!
I didn't make the rule. It is there for a reason. I'm not an engineer and you didn't bring your degree.
Watch a few episodes of Mayday and figure out that bad things can happen.
I am just trying to make it to the end of the day without having to pay for your surgery to have this device removed from your lower intestine.
***"Stow Your Bags"***
First, maybe learn to pack. Take everything you NEED for your trip and place it on your bed. Look VERY closely at everything there. Do you really need 6 extra pairs of socks for your trip to Hawaii? Your going to wear at most two pairs of shorts, a pair of flip flops, and a shirt, for every other day! You already waxed so don't even need underwear.
Then before you get on the plane maybe try and see if what you packed fits in the Sizing Device. These are the tall metal artwork looking things you see every 30 feet inside of every airport in the world. Your not going to jail it it doesn't fit. But you will go to jail if your 12 inch long knitting needle goes through someones hand as they are trying to fit your entire life into a bin that is sized just large enough for a crying child of up to 5 years of age.
On this subject:
If you can't lift it, why should I. Unless there is a physical limitation your just lazy.
I don't care if there isn't enough room ( see step one: learn to pack).
When you say "Well it fit last time" usually this means you had enough sense to board early enough to stake a claim on the entire stowage compartment on your last flight.
More to come, Happy Flying!!
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